WE ALL START SOMEWHERE…
I started my weight loss journey a little over 6 years ago. The other day, a video from back then popped up on my TimeHop, and I couldn’t help but notice how young and awkward I looked. In that video, I shared my weight loss story, which marked the beginning of my journey to open up about all the challenges and triumphs I’ve faced. It was right after Gretchen was born, and as I watched it, I thought, “Oh my gosh, how embarrassing!” But it made me realize that I haven’t shared my story in a long time.
MY WEIGHT LOSS JOURNEY
I’ve been doing home workouts and eating clean for 10 years now. I’ve lost over 50 pounds before meeting David, after having Gretchen, after Ralph, and now I’m on my journey for baby #3, Claire. In total, I’ve shed more than 170 pounds with these programs. So, I wanted to share my journey because it’s a story many people don’t know.
I’ve always struggled with my weight. When I think back to elementary school, I remember moments of feeling self-conscious, which has fueled my mission now to truly embrace my body, appreciate the process, and enjoy the journey of self-improvement. I never want my daughters to experience what I did growing up. I was always aware of my weight; it probably started around Gretchen’s age because I was always the tallest among my friends, just as Gretchen is now. Once I hit puberty in 5th grade, I stopped growing taller. I remember standing at the back or in the middle of class photos because I was so much taller than everyone else, boys and girls alike. I felt self-conscious about my size back then because I often received comments like, “Oh, you’re a big girl,” which, although not malicious, affected me deeply. Looking back, I realize there’s a big difference between saying that and simply acknowledging someone’s height.
Puberty brought more changes—my chest started growing rapidly (I have quite large breasts, by the way!). From 6th grade through high school, I went up a cup size every year. Breastfeeding increased my bust size again, and Dave and I plan for one more baby before I get a breast reduction.
So, weight has always been a struggle. Even in high school, despite being a cheerleader, I felt self-conscious about my appearance compared to my friends. I had a curvier figure—my waist was 27 inches even at my smallest, my hips 38 inches, and with my bust, I was a classic hourglass shape. I looked different, and that made me insecure. Back then, I didn’t know much about healthy eating; I thought Costco muffins and Caesar salads were the way to go. Needless to say, I didn’t see results.
Now I understand that true results come from what you eat. But back then, I was clueless about healthy eating. Perhaps it was a generational thing, but we grew up with unhealthy foods like Lunchables, Easy Cheese, sugary cereals, and fruit snacks. Now, I’m breaking those habits for my family—I want my kids to grow up with fruits, vegetables, and hummus, not the junk food I struggled with.
After high school, I went to the University of Washington, where I gained weight. Toward the end of college, I started doing hot yoga twice a day, every day—I’m super flexible and was a dancer, so I loved it. That helped me slim down a bit.
Later, I joined Teach For America and moved to eastern North Carolina, where I also gained weight. It became clear that I’d been struggling with weight my whole life. I vividly remember flying from North Carolina to Seattle for the holidays and getting a Facebook notification from Mom tagging me in Christmas photos. My first thought off the plane was to rush home and untag myself from all those photos—I didn’t want my friends or family seeing candid shots where I felt I looked huge. It was a sad realization—I didn’t want to live like that anymore. I was tired of feeling self-conscious about my weight all the time. So, I decided to take action. I researched how to lose weight the right way—I’d tried quick fixes in college like juice cleanses, cabbage soup diets, HCG drops, shakes, wraps, and pills, but none worked. I wanted something sustainable.
I turned to YouTube, searching for “how to lose weight” and avoiding anything that promised quick fixes like “drink this shake” or “take this pill.” Instead, I focused on learning about clean eating—shop the store perimeter, eat foods with only one ingredient like chicken and oatmeal, and drink a gallon of water a day. I started applying these principles while teaching in a small school where I didn’t want to join a gym—everyone knew everyone, and I didn’t want people knowing I was trying to lose weight. Looking back, I realize how silly that was, but at the time, I just wanted to avoid the discomfort of feeling watched while working out. So, I found a dance workout online that I loved—Hip Hop Abs—and did it twice a day before and after school. It cost $12, the only program I could afford with student debt and a small teaching salary. In one month, doing that and eating clean, I lost 12-15 pounds—I even bought a scale to track my progress.
But soon, I wanted more variety in my workouts. I heard about another program, Insanity, at a Christmas party, and despite its $200 price tag, I was determined to invest in my health. It was hard—I struggled through the first day’s warm-up, but I refused to quit. I kept pushing, modifying exercises when needed, sticking to my clean eating plan. Within 60 days, I went from barely keeping up to doing full push-ups for 30 minutes straight. I was in the best shape of my life and even started training for a half-marathon. I’d lost 60 pounds and felt incredible.
It wasn’t just about the weight or fitting into smaller clothes—it was about feeling confident. In high school, I used to avoid lake trips and make excuses not to go out because I felt self-conscious. Now, I eagerly went to the beach without a second thought about wearing a swimsuit, even sitting down in it. I felt amazing, and people noticed—they asked what I was doing, and that’s when I met Dave. Meeting him felt like perfect timing because I’d finally started to embrace and love myself. I realized people could like me for who I am, not out of pity. I didn’t date much in college or high school, but with Dave, I felt worthy—not because I was smaller, but because I’d changed so much on the inside during my weight loss journey.
Dave and I got married, I maintained my weight loss, and then we were blessed with our daughter, Gretchen. I gained back all the weight during pregnancy, plus more. I reassured myself it was normal because I was pregnant, and everyone said breastfeeding would help me lose it. But six months postpartum, I still hadn’t made progress. This time, I wanted to lose weight not just to fit into my pre-pregnancy jeans but because I lacked the energy and stamina I once had. I couldn’t do simple things like climb stairs without getting winded or do laundry without feeling exhausted. I was ready to regain my strength and set a good example for Gretchen.
I discovered there was a shorter version of Insanity—only 30 minutes a day—so I received it as a birthday gift. A friend was doing it too, and I joined her group of women for accountability. It was during this group that I learned about coaching and creating a supportive community. I saw an opportunity to help others and earn extra income, so I joined as a coach after losing the baby weight. Looking back, I wish I’d started sharing my journey from the beginning, like many successful coaches on my team who’ve inspired others by documenting their entire process. Some of you follow me now to see the journey—I share my daily struggles, especially through this third postpartum experience, which has been tougher than ever to shed the weight. Coaching became a fun way for me to contribute while Dave worked two jobs.
To summarize, I lost the weight after Gretchen, gained it with our son Ralph, and now, despite my best efforts—daily workouts and healthy eating—I gained 50 pounds with Ralph. But this time, I’ve been able to lose it more quickly.
Dave eventually went to the Police Academy, leaving me with a two-year-old and a two-month-old for six days a week while he was away. It was tough, especially with the Washington winter, and I didn’t focus as much on weight loss, gaining more than I had at 40 weeks pregnant with Gretchen. Looking back, I wish I looked like that now.
But I have to pause here—Gretchen has a dance recital, and I need to get her ready. I’ll finish my story soon to update you on where I am now postpartum and where I started. Many have asked about baby #4—no, I’m not pregnant yet, but I want to be soon. I won’t conceive until I reach a certain weight range because my third pregnancy was so hard. My hips dislocated, and I had severe pain, so I want to be healthier before another pregnancy. My goal is to reach 160-170 pounds by September, and if I’m not there yet, I’ll delay getting pregnant. It’s great motivation to keep working hard.
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